This past year thought me many things. Strangely it has had a form of paralysis affect upon me. A fear to write or talk about it also. Only yesterday, did I find the courage to share more insights into some of it, to my closest. In some way I nearly wanted the experience to not be real so I can feel safe.

People talk about experiencing their greatest fears. Drowning, fire, heights, although I never really knew mine. Now I know. Facing it has been really tough and very hard to get my head around. Were it not for all the love that surrounded me through this journey of 2019, I am not sure what! So, on a lighter note, what are the lessons and gratitude that I can share to others that may be of some use.

  • Believe what you can see and feel – our minds’ can be a powerful ally or enemy. 2019 brought me through a rather harrowing journey of anxiety. Appalling panick attacks and elated fears. I empathise deeply with long term suffers of these type of anxieties. Some of the techniques that I learnt from others might help. One size does not fit all, so find something that works for you.
    • Positive affirmations – love Louise Haye
    • Acupuncture – found this amazing
    • Magnesium or B Complex vitamins
    • Meditation, mindfulness (loads of types)
    • Tapping – defo worked on occasion
    • Grounding exercises – worked when things were really bad
    • Be still for longer – take time for yourself every morning
    • Find someone you can share with – this is essential. Isolation when you are suffering is atrocious. Even though the fear wants to keep you away from everyone. Punch it in the face and be around people. And share even a little bit. You will be surprised by the amount of people that are suffering by themselves. Together is better.
    • Breath work – try reduce to 6 breaths in 1 min. Defo helps.
    • Remind yourself that the anxiety will ease. Things get better. Even though at times it feels endless. It gets better.
    • Write down 3 things every day you are happy with yourself for. Can be as simple as, I opened a door for someone.
    • Gratitude 5 things every day also really helped me. From electricity, to having my senses, there is so much to be grateful for.
    • Gentle exercise, outdoors in nature and singing also helped.
    • Forgiveness for myself and others.
    • Looking yourself in the mirror and telling yourself that you love you. This one can be tricky at the beginning. Keep at it.
  • Visualise what you want for yourself – I am so grateful for experiencing one of the most special days in my life in 2019. A day filled with all the love anyone can ever want. Surrounded by family and friends we got to celebrate together new beginnings and the power of love. And the power of belief. Visualizations is a truly magical force that requires unresolving commitment. You need unfaltering 2020 vision. Even when the storm is crashing against your shore, you find a small piece of hope, light and you anchor yourself to it. It is quite incredible what you can create when you have a strong enough vision.
  • Make the most of the limited time you have – I am so grateful to have spent time with my mum before she died at the end of July. We all have demons and angers and unspoken things that we put on the long finger. Tomorrow. I’ll get around to it. I suppose part of me knew for quite sometime that Ann will leave me someday, although I never really wanted to deal with it. I had a lot of stuff I needed to let go of and for so many years it got in the way of me loving fully. I’m not saying I had it all worked out before Ann went on to her next journey although I’m so glad I got to really speak, listen and spend time with a lady like her. Try hard to find a way of resolving the unresolved. I was haunted for years over the conversations I never had with my dad.
  • Love like no one is watching – I always lived the phrase, ‘dance like no one is watching’. The same goes for love. It has nothing to do with anyone else and no one can ever quite understand it from your point of view. Give it without thought or consideration of return. What you give out you get back. Shine the light of love at every opportunity. There is nothing quite like it.
  • Take advice with a pinch of salt – there were times in 2019 where my brain felt like it was about to explode listening to a gazillion viewpoints. I’m eternally grateful for the intention of love where all this energy came from although sometimes just STOP. Pause. Breath. Connect with you. Let it all fall away. Be still. Be. When all the leaves come to rest, amongst the array of patterns, you will feel the path. Trust in yourself. Or learn to. It may seem bonkers although, you have all the answers. Take this with a pinch of salt also. What do I know!
  • You are perfect right where you are now – thank you to the amazing Clodagh for this stunning insight. Yes, a solar year has passed and we sit at the blank canvas of 2020. You are exactly where you are meant to be. 2019 and every year to date has prepared what ever vision you chose to draw on the canvas going forward. You are perfectly you. Now, what do you want to create?

Love and guidance on your new designs and visualizations for 2020 and beyond.

Sam

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